Let There Be Light

Read somewhere that at the point of sale the buyer enters the realm of lunacy. Perhaps in my case it is going further into that state of senility.  I needed a new computer monitor like a moose needs a hat rack.  So I got one anyway.  At home I disconnected old reliable and prepared the new one for installation. All hooked up and gave it power. No bells - no whistles - no lights.  There had to be an On gizmo somewhere. None indicated on the direction sheet. Looked at the dark screen with regret.

Called the 800 number and went through the usual blind aural alleys until, I reached the 'elevator music'.
Finally a human voice and explained the set-up, the dark screen etc.  

"Do you see the logo on the lower front? Good. It is on the right  from the logo. Just push on it."

"I pushed on the front near the right end. Nothing happened."

"You talk to my supervisor."

More elevator music.

Finally a human voice and explained the set-up, the dark screen etc.

"Do you see the logo on the lower front? Good. It is on the right from the logo. Just push on it."

"I pushed on the front near the right end. Nothing happened."

"What you should do is going on to the internet at " xxx.com" and it will tell you what is wrong."

"THAT IS MOST STUPID STATEMENT I EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE!  I'm sitting here with a blank screen and you are telling me to go on the internet to find out what is wrong. "

Returned the monitor to the store and made a fool out of myself as well as verifying the inadequacy of two tech reps.  The "On" button was underneath the front on the right from the logo.

Guess the moral of the story is there are three people who don't know which end is down.